People aren’t defined by one aspect of their identity. Nevertheless, I think our inherent traits, our abilities and our experiences all combine to inform how we approach the world and navigate life.
So, how does one reconcile being the child of sexual assault?
I wanted to learn more so I sat down with Lane Clarke to talk about her debut novel “Love Times Infinity,” a layered rom-com that answers big questions about identity, family and love.
I’m Josh Rivera, Travel editor with USA TODAY and avid fiction reader. And you’re reading “This is America,” a newsletter centered on race, identity and how they shape our lives.
A little over a month ago, in a 6-3 decision, the Supreme Court said Roe v. Wade was “egregiously wrong from the start.” Pregnant people’s access to safe abortions is not guaranteed. It’s a polarizing issue where everyone has an opinion about it, but sometimes the voices of those with first-hand experience get lost in the mix.
“When I first wrote (‘Love Times Infinity’), I would probably say that I was pretty pro-life. More so just because I was at a stage I was like, well I don’t even know that I’m allowed to not be because of you know, where I come from,” Clarke told USA TODAY’s This is America. “But I think in writing, you can learn just as much from your characters as you can from the writing process itself.”
Clarke, who has been open about her own journey as a child of sexual assault, channeled her lived experiences into a poignant romance novel for young adults. “Love Times Infinity,” which hit shelves Tuesday, comes at a time when sex therapists say anxiety over sex has soared in the wake of the Supreme Court’s decision, causing people to reconsider sex, dating and relationships.
The following Q&A was edited for length and clarity.
Tell us a little bit about ‘Love Times Infinity’
“Love Times Infinity” is about 16-year-old Michie Cooper, who, in addition to trying to figure out what to write for her college essays, gets contacted by her estranged mother, who she hasn’t had a relationship with for the past 10 years. (The two) have a strange relationship due to Michie being the product of her mother’s sexual assault, and her just trying to come to terms with that origin of who she is and her place in the world.
You describe Derek saying he’s soft and emotional, can you talk a little about why it was important to have a Black character with those traits?
I just think so often the world tries to tell, especially Black men – Black boys – one that they don’t matter, but to that they have to kind of be strong all the time. You can’t really ever let your guard down. And I think to some extent, that’s true. But I also think that Black boys deserve to see that, you know, it’s, it’s OK to be emotional, it’s OK to share those emotions, it’s OK to cry. That doesn’t make you less than because you are that way. And it was really important for me to show that you’re deserving of love. You know, no one’s thinking that you’re, you’re less of a man if that’s what you want to identify as – and I really do think that’s so important.
Why do you think it’s important to center BIPOC characters in love stories?
Black girls deserve to see themselves loved on and Black boys deserve to see themselves loved on.
There definitely is some, but not a lot of teen media that portrays young Black characters together. A lot of times it’s a Black character with a character who’s not Black; oftentimes white. And I just think it’s a different kind of relationship with different kinds of understanding between two Black teenagers, especially in the school they go to, that’s not that diverse at all.
And just (an) inherent understanding that exists there that – while I don’t ever really need to discuss it – I think it is something that especially Black readers have kind of picked up on that, they just immediately get one another.
How did your background inform the character of Michie?
I think I started from a place of what are the things that I was really struggling with when I was that age. And even really up into when I started writing, the book was a lot of the same type of negative self-talk that Michie goes through. And it’s interesting because I think I changed so much writing this book. And when I first wrote it, I would probably say that I was pretty pro-life more so just because I was at a stage I was like, well I don’t even know that I’m allowed to not be because of you know, where I come from. And that is kind of how I initially thought Michie would be.
But I think in writing, you can learn just as much from your characters as you can from the writing process itself.
And when I thought about who she was as a person, and how she would kind of interact with the people around her – and I don’t want to spoil anything – but that goes through certain things that maybe she would; for me, I was like, I thought that … I felt a certain way about it, but it doesn’t really feel like Michie would feel that way. And if Michie is so closely tied to who I am, then maybe I have to investigate that in myself as well.
I think it started off kind of me thinking that I was like putting myself in Michie, (but) she kind of ended up putting herself in me.
What do you hope readers walk away feeling or knowing after reading ‘Love Times Infinity’?
I just hope (readers) get a new perspective.
I think there are a lot of voices, especially now about what it means to be the child of a rape. What you think, you know, that effect has on women. And I just want readers to see my true story and just get a new perspective.
It’s not meant to lecture anyone. It’s not meant to posit any decision for anyone. It’s just saying, “Hey, this is one of those children that everyone likes to speak for who has her own voice,” and include that in their thought process.
… I just hope everyone goes into “Love Times Infinity” with an open mind. I know that it kind of has a very fluffy cover. It looks just like a kind of soft love story, and it is, but it also touches on a lot of deeper, deeper messages. And check the content warnings for sure. Read safely. But yeah, I’m just excited for everyone to read it.
Could you share a little bit about your journey to publication?
I started my career as an attorney. I just kind of had a wall between jobs for a bit when I started writing this book. There wasn’t really (a) goal to get it published. I was kind of just writing for myself trying to come to terms with my own feelings about my own upbringing and where I came from.
When I finished, I sent it to a couple of friends like, “Hey, you know, is this any good?” … And when my friends were kind of like, this is really good, that kind of started me poking around into publishing, seeing what it was all about.
It really all happened pretty fast. I had an agent within a couple of months, and then six months after that, I had a deal, and it was just very fast. And now with (the book) coming out during all of this, all this Roe v. Wade debacle it kind of almost feels like it was fate, like it’s like all these things happened at the exact right time to put it in this space. … Like this book was supposed to be here now.
… I really didn’t expect to talk so deeply about my own life. It’s kind of like, “Oh, you know, it’s very safe, confined in this book.” And yeah, it’s me, but it doesn’t, have to be a topic of discussion. And then I kind of felt like, “No, people should know that I’m writing this book, not as like an authority or anything, but like it’s coming from a place where it’s authentic.” It’s like, this is the story, and it’s mine.
What advice would you give on how to get started writing?
I think so many people are just afraid to even start, and you don’t have to start writing novels. Fan fiction is a great, very real way to be a writer … (you) do things that are fun, share it with your friends, have groups, write whatever you want. Don’t worry about what the market wants or what’s popular on any social media site, just write the things that you enjoy.
Look at the authors that you enjoy reading and try and – not copy them – emulate them a little bit, and I think that helps you eventually get to your own voice. But just have fun with it and do it and don’t put a lot of pressure on yourself to be perfect.
Bonus: If Michie and Derek were real people, what would their favorite songs be? What are they listening to?
Michie’s favorite song would probably be something by Aaliyah. She just is an Aaliyah stan … it’s like the one at the end of like “Romeo Must Die” (“Try Again”), that’s her favorite song.
And then Derek’s would be probably “Love Me Now” by John Legend. He’s a big ol’ softie.
—
This is America is a weekly take on current events from a rotating panel of USA TODAY Network journalists with diverse backgrounds and viewpoints. If you’re seeing this newsletter online or someone forwarded it to you, you can subscribe here. If you have feedback for us, we’d love for you to drop it here.